Product design inspired by Hungarian lore
In 1051, the Holy Roman emperor’s fleet attacked Hungary, laying siege to the riverside town of Pozsony (now Bratislava). According to legend, Kund – a simple soldier, but great diver – swam under the Roman fleet and sunk it single-handedly, using a manual drill. Now he is ready to heat up the situation again, inside your tea mug!
In Hungary, the law concerning executions by beheading stated that if the head was not severed from the body by the third blow of the sword, the convict was automatically pardoned. This should have been the case with László Hunyadi, whose dense hairdo resisted three cuts. Unfortunately, the King disliked him enough to grant the executioner a fourth attempt. Now, László’s plastic reincarnation is here to make sure your knives aren’t as blunt as his executioner’s was.
Lord Koppány was about to be king when his nephew, Stephen, who had just turned christian, stepped up and claimed a divine right to the throne. Not a fan of the whole new-age mambo-jumbo, Koppány declared war – but was defeated, drawn and quartered with christianly elegance.
BLOOD PACT SET
In 895, the Seven Chieftains founded Hungary through a blood pact. Now you can follow in their footsteps and bleed your business partners dry in perfect, sterile safety thanks to our hygienic blood pact set.
The Holy King Leslie had two special powers: he saved pretty Hungarian girls from the clutches of the enemy and came back from the dead (at least his head did) to lead Hungarian armies to a post-mortem victory. His lore combined with some sleek, high-tech design provides our customers with a handy anti-rape alarm.
During the Turkish army’s siege of Nándorfehérvár, an attacker was about to place the Turkish banner on the castle’s tower, thus claiming victory. Titusz Dugovics prevented this by seizing the offender and leaping to both their deaths. You can watch him re-enact this heroic act in the form of our slinky stair-walker.
Under the reign of Louis I, the palatine of Hungary once lost his way in the countryside and asked a sturdy young agricultural worker for directions using a now-proverbial phrase: “Which way to Buda, peasant?” The ‘peasant’, Miklós Toldi, was duly offended and replied by picking up a gigantic wooden beam and pointing it in the desired direction. This feat earned him a leading rank in the king’s personal army and a lifetime of romantic and political misery.
This design tool is dedicated to one of our favorite Hungarian artists and national symbols. A.T.I. is a great artist and statesman who moves elegantly in the most prestigious circles, be it weddings, funerals, pro-government rallies or alien abductions.
When King Saint Stephen’s son died, Vazul was heir to the Hungarian throne. The King and his evil foreign wife didn’t like this so much, so according to the custom of the times, they ordered Vazul to be blinded and his ears filled with burning lead, banishing him to the politics-free zone of rest and relaxation.
Ernő Nemecsek is one of the heroes of Ferenc Molnár’s youth novel “The Paul Street Boys”. Nemecsek is a little boy, but also a symbol of loyalty and determination, a symbol that dies of pneumonia after the evil “Redshirts” force him to stand in cold water for hours. Just think of that self-sacrifice while he prepares your tea.
György Dózsa led a very popular peasant uprising in 1514. His armies successfully occupied several of the nobility’s estates, often taking cruel revenge on the former masters. The revolutionaries were eventually defeated and Dózsa was roasted on a heated iron throne and partially fed to his comrades. The Dózsa Chess features a regular royalist army on one side and a democratic syndicate of red pawns on the other.
The Holy Crown, aside from being a holy crown, is also a legal person not only representing, but actually being the Hungarian Government. And now you can be the Hungarian Government too, wearing this simplified, trendy, knit version!
Saint Gellért was an Italian missionary so respected by King Saint Stephen that he was made into a bishop. Unfortunately he crossed paths with some nationalist rebels, who were fed up with all the foreign influence. He was shut into a barrel and rolled to his death from a hill in Budapest, which today bears his name and skid marks.
As he was fleeing the extreme overpower of the Turkish army at Mohács, King Lajos’ horse stumbled while crossing the Csele stream. If only he had our present-day jumping technology, he wouldn’t have fallen in the water and drowned.
PARTY MIX PLATTER
“Trianon” refers to a peace treaty signed in 1920 wherein Hungary was punished for its role in WWI. Among other sanctions, two thirds of the country were annexed to its neighbours. Whether this was geopolitical rape, rightful retribution or something inbetween is an excellent topic of conversation around our commemorative snack platter set.
In these tense political times, we should all learn to just lay back and squeeze those lemons life has given us.
Saint Stephen’s right hand was miraculously preserved after his death. It’s currently on display inside the Basilica, pointing the country in just the right direction. With all the current changes both in Hungary’s national spirit and its infrastructure, we all need a Holy Hand to grab on to.
It was perhaps Elisabeth’s rich and powerful family background that earned her the rumors of bathing regularly in the blood of her young servant girls in order to gain eternal youth. True or not, the gossip worked very effectively: she was tried, imprisoned, went mad and died.
Felicián Zách was a self-respecting feudal lord. After hearing that his daughter was seduced by the Queen’s brother, Zách entered the royal dining room and attempted to kill the royal family, but managed only to cause a few major injuries, notably he amputated four of the Queen’s fingers. He and his whole family were tortured, humiliated and/or killed.
WALL SHOWER BRACKET
The women of Eger castle managed to get out of the kitchen for a few hours during the Turks’ siege. Lore tells us they fought fiercely and amongst other deeds, used the kitchen equipment inappropriately to pour boiling water on the incoming migrants. Become a wetback yourself with our exclusive shower head holder!
Copyright (c) 2016 Sütő András, Turai Balázs. All Rights Reserved.
Pista Contenta is a Hungarian-born artist residing in Uruguay. In 1999 he abandoned his beloved homeland due to ideological reasons, giving up a prospering career in trade and customs.
He settled in a little town called Punta Del Diablo on the shore of the Atlantic Ocean, and attended courses at the local University of Art. He majored summa cum laude in product design, animation direction and shamanism.
The Hungarophilia project was inspired by his homesickness and his love of Hungarian lore. The exhibition is open until the 22nd of August 2016 at Gallery Anda Que No, Montevideo.